Finding Your Pathway

This is MY tale of opening doors and finding my own pathways.

This story will intertwine my personal and work life, and my struggle to be seen past the “bubbly feminine first impression” that people see, and accept that’s just who I am!

As I share my story with you, I invite you to take a moment and consider what your internal voice/story might have been.

Looking back over my career in a male dominated industry I could almost have a chuckle that I made here at all!

Having in interest in technology with parents who shared their knowledge, one an accountant the other a trade and both business minded, I was always encouraged. I remember how many people who didn’t know me, would comment “You should be a teacher – you are so great with kids”.

I felt my inner self screaming silently inside “But I don’t want that”! I would always smile politely back and thank them for the compliments, all the while thinking how much I loved buildings and wanted a life in that field, BUT secretly letting the thought creep in “What if they knew something about my ability I didn’t?”

Somewhere along the way I found that I love chasing new opportunities, and that has never left me until one time in my life... but I will come back to that soon.

I finished Uni, ONLY one of 4 women in my course in Building Science, specialising in Sustainability and Project Management.

I learned early on – only the best Architects get full control over the design, but you can get exposure to much more variety as a Project Manager, AND you influence the concept from inception.

The graduating class was small, so we were a close-knit co-ed bunch and honestly, it never occurred to me that I was entering a male dominated industry once, nor was it ever pointed out to me.

After uni, I interviewed for jobs as a Graduate Project Manager. I went to 4 interviews and got offered 3 roles - I was stoked!

I soaked up everything and worked in a close team, I worked on exciting and important infrastructure that is still in Wellington today. While I started my new full-time job, I also still worked weekends at my parents’ restaurant.

For those interested - our family were the first to have a Nando’s franchise in New Zealand. Mmmmm…. Peri Peri!!!

That’s “Overseas Experience” for all of your non-New Zealanders!

Ready for a bit of adventure I decided to move to Tokyo to teach English for a one-year gap.

Having just started in a PM role, the Director of the Company was not happy with me. They had plans. They had invested. And I shouldn’t waste such an opportunity. Not wrong but, I figured that type of job would always be there in some shape or form, and I was determined to go and nothing was stopping me.

When one year turned into two, I decided it was time to get back to life and if I didn’t leave at that point, I would never.

As much as I loved it, I wasn’t living my dream or following my passion.

When I returned to Wellington, I was different, and nothing fit anymore. I only stayed for 6 months and struggled to find a job - suddenly the words of my old Director played over in my mind. I couldn’t help but wonder – was he right?

Had I stuffed it all up?

Always being one that builds good relationships and confident enough to know when to ask for help, I moved to Melbourne and put out as many feelers as I could. I got rejection after rejection – no one even recognised what a Building Science Degree was. I was starting to feel as though it was all a bit too hard.

Needing to a step forward in any direction, I took a job in a call centre while I continued to apply for jobs, although I realised I wasn’t getting anywhere. I needed to take a sidestep – and I got a graduate job in a glazing film company when an old friend from university got in touch. He got me an interview in his construction company. BOOM.

It was there that I started to notice a few differences, I was older and there were very little women in the Company. I got along with everyone and made close friends, many of whom I can still call on for help today.

After two years, I wasn’t getting anywhere, I wasn’t paid well, there was no support or true guidance in the role, it was sink or swim. Reflecting back now it was hard, but I was learning and thriving even though I was getting pigeon holed.

I decided I wanted to get back into client-side PM in a serious relationship, I was now thinking about what life would look like in my 30’s… a family was in my future, I knew it.

Again, it was a hard transition as now I was seen to be construction side only, and the rejections started coming in. One boutique PM consultancy said “I was too giddy” and I felt shame over my own personality. I needed to be less me and more like them. This sentence haunted me for years.

I took a leap of faith and enrolled in RMIT undertaking a Master of Project Management.

This was THE thing that got me my next role as a Client-Side Project Manager. For the next four years I studied part-time and worked full time.

It was here that I became confident in myself. I thrived. I was supported and accepted for who I was and my style, and I thrived as I moved up in the organisation from Project Manager to Senior PM in buildings to Senior PM in Major Projects.

While this was happening professionally, my family journey started but it was not what I expected.

We had a series of setbacks starting our family, an ectopic pregnancy resulting in a loss of a tube, followed by a second trimester pregnancy loss. I co-founded BuildHer while this was going on and almost as soon as I decided to leave the security of full-time income to the rocky start up world, we fell pregnant with our rainbow baby.

BuildHer was a whirlwind of excitement, innovation and I took joy in building a stand-out course and lessons for a loving and kind community of like-minded women!

I drew on my PM experience to develop a system that could be easily picked up by novices and experienced renovators. I wanted to show best practice and show that as women and buyers of construction services we can lift the calibre of the industry together.

I did things I never ever imagined… started a Podcast, wrote and book, hosted events and workshops and spoke at events. Previously I had had the worst case of stage fright one could ever imagine!!!